The other day I over heard two women talking and one of them looked like she had been crying. I heard her whisper ” My 2nd is now 18months (1 1/2 years old), and I still can’t look in the mirror. I’m still trying to accept the new me after my kids, but I’m just having a hard time with it…”
My internal voice started to speak and my mind was racing. I had so much to say to this woman. This mother is going through what every mother goes through at some point and sometimes just telling someone you’ve been there too makes a difference. I WISH I had said what I was thinking, but my 2 year old had to pee and my 10 month old needed her bottle so I rushed out before a major melt down.
If my babies hadn’t been crying and I wasn’t in a rush, this is what I wish I could have shared to this broken mother at the store…
When I came home from the hospital after having my first, I would break down and cry every time I looked into the mirror. To make things worse, I had an emergency c section so I couldn’t even get out of bed without the help of my husband for the first 3 1/2 weeks of being home. I was SO bloated (almost swollen) from all the hormones and excess water trying to exit my body. NONE of my normal clothes fit me… not even my stretchy clothes and after my baby turned 3 months old, it was still the same. I mean isn’t that the magic number for your body to just magically pop back to it’s “normal” self? People started telling me THIS was my new normal and your body just changes after having a baby. But I REFUSED to accept that.
So there I was, a new mom with a beautiful, healthy, happy, baby girl, and an extra whopping 60 freaking lbs of pure me, myself, and I. No joke. I gained 60 POUNDS. No one truly warned me about what pregnancy did to a woman’s body or maybe they did and I just didn’t get it. I just ate whatever, whenever, and exercised rarely, but I truly believed I would bounce right back. I was always in shape and always had an athletic build so why not? HA! I was SO. Damn. Wrong.
Before baby, I was always active and played sports so I never had to seriously loose weight before. If I did, it was only a couple pounds here and there and to loose the weight, I went on any fad diet imaginable. Of course that theory crashed and burned after I had my baby. I then started to educate myself on healthy living (not dieting) and I had a revelation. It’s not the number on the scale, but the way you look and feel. It was a full mind and body transformation.
I ended up finding a program that worked for me and with extreme hard work, discipline, determination and exhaustion, I was able to get back down to my normal size by the time my first was 9 months old. With my second, I lost the baby weight much faster! The main reasons being, I didn’t gain 60lbs, I waited to get pregnant until after I lost all my previous baby weight, and I learned from my previous mistakes.
Regardless of my story, I’ve been there too. We’ve all been there. And yes, I know we are all truly beautiful just the way we are but I’m not talking about beauty. I’m talking about happiness and thinking something is not achievable. I’m here to tell you it is achievable.
I promise you are capable of anything. It is not easy. There were times I cried and cursed and slipped and screamed and hated myself for allowing me to do this to my body, and there were times I was so tired and sore I could barely even move, but I did it. I have two beautiful babies and I’m at my goal weight and in the best shape of my life. Now that’s not to say I don’t have the occasional chili cheese fries, but it’s the every day of living a healthy and fit life.
My whole point is that YOU are capable of anything, so do not settle. The journey is not easy, but it is so worth it in the end.
The secret to my fitness success was realizing that you need to “fall in love” with working out AND a healthy lifestyle… which sounds easy, but it is quite challenging. You also have to be consistent. At first, when you start working out after a hiatus, you want to break up with it immediately. You can barely catch your breath, your muscles are weak, and you feel like you are going to throw up and sometimes the thought of death pops into your mind. The next day is even worse because you are so sore you can barley move. But all of a sudden, you start to see a different number on the scale, and your pants are fitting a little differently, and the work outs are getting easier. The truth is, the work outs are not getting easier, but you are getting better. When you actually let it all go and fall in love with the process you will start to see results and THAT is worth all the blood, sweat, and tears.
So to all those broken mothers, YOU are not broken. Do not accept anything less than being happy. You are capable of getting your body back after pregnancy, that is, if you want it back.
For more health & fitness motivation, check out 5 Tips on How to Get your Butt to the Gym! Also, if you were inspired, please share this post! It may help another person going through the same exact thing, and this is exactly why I created this site.